For those desperate times...

Use only in emergencies

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A white christmas to you

The christmas has come and gone without even a knock at the door. I am beginning to think that.. its not the Christmas spirit that is lacking progressively each year. Its just that I'm getting older every year. Depressing thought.

I had the best Christmas night ever. And she gave me the best christmas gift ever. I can almost become religious I think. What I am going through now has rendered all my other interests to a dull gray. Huddling in corners screaming for backup in the online world of Desert Combat doesnt hold the same thrill. Snapping off single shots at furtive movements in the jungles of BFV:Point of Existence doesnt excite me. Quite obvious where I am headed.

My mind is now in a state of torpor. I just cant think. I only have a very pretty picture in my head. My only fear now is loss.


I can only lose what I have

Wish you guys a Happy Incoming New Year.
Hope you guys smiled at Christmas

Wow

All I can say is. Wow. Life. Is. Good.

Highrollers

Today. I was made aware of the stake of an emotional bet. The gamble. And the trust you place your emotional heart onto the hands of the other person. How every word and gesture brings bile to your throat and promises you a life of pain or bliss. An eldritch storm of thoughts,passion and sensations that threaten to overwhelm your thinking.

True strength is exhibited at this point. I just hope I have the strength to endure this

Cell shaded homeworld2 

Stand Down Soldier

The following is the log of communications in 'Kevin Body Network 001" at December 12 Sunday 1900 onwards.

Helm: Give me a Flash Sitrep
Leg: All fine here. Could do with some authorized movement. Slight cramp
Hands: Got ourselves full with the food
Digestion: Mouth needs some checking. Having trouble talking and chewing. Stomach section reports heavy digestion issues. Dont expect energy boosy until late tommorow.
Brain: Conversations are going fine. Might run out of topics but thats not a danger at the moment. Situations under control.
Helm: Understood. Steer conversations towards mild probing. Hand gestures increase. I need that energy soon. Initate order for coffee
Brain: Initate coffee order aye.
Hand: On the way.
Brain: We seem kinda happy boss
Helm: Great. I will be in my bunk. wake me in 2200 unless theres an emergency.

2100 Dec 12

Brain: Flash flash situation shift. *** is implying she wants to go somewhere else instead of home. States question of 'are you bored'. Requesting orders out.
Memory: Records state theres a nearby Mamak store for drinks and conversation
Social cognitive: She wants only conversation. Suggestion approved
Mating Drive: I dont think my boys are going to get any action today?
Helm: Negative on that MD. Initate drive order.

2115 Dec 12

Brain: Noting ***'es actions are getting more energetic. Subjects of conversation are great. Plenty of matches but we're running out of energy.
Helm: Darn. Should have kept some reserves from yesterday.
Digestion: I'm giving her all she's got captain!
Helm: I hear you. Brain. Tune to attentive smile mode
Brain: Attentive smile mode aye.
Hands: Reporting uneasy fidget.
Helm: Keep it handled hand. We cant help you now.
Brain: Progress is good captain. We got an influx of dirty jokes. Subject is now perceived as frank and open. Shall I authorize full scale conversation sir?
Helm: Do that. But only at Defcon 3.
Brain: No conversations about Dnd aye.

0035 December 13

Brain: My boys cant handle it anymore sir. Last nights strain is getting here. I had to medivac the 'energetic conversation' department out. Powers out in there. Looks ugly boss
Helm: Thats it. Sound the evac
Brain: Evac sounded boss.

0045 December 13

Brain: Going... going... subject has entered the house. We're done!
Helm: Oh geez.... what a night. Hows everyone?
Legs: We lost some boss but otherwise we're great
Hands: Looks ugly here boss. We had to strain our muscles abit and it cost us some boys. Muscles would be out
Digestion: Digestions smooth boss. We're letting out air to relieve pressure.
Helm: Good job guys. Stand down.
MatingDrive: Getting bored here boss
Helm: In time. Out.

Nailbiting

I'm having a date!... tonight!... and I feel lousy as hell. I havent had a haircut in a few weeks. I am still having a light head from last night. And I sure as hell dont feel like eating. And I'm having a date tonight!

Even her names ominous. Why. Why am I so dumb!