My trash basket!

I Muse

2008-01-01T17:52:00.000-08:00

Hold up your hand. Face your palm towards you. Stare at it. Think. What are you looking at? An open palm? A limb of your body? An extension of you? Yet I am thinking. How do I know? How do I know the colour of my skin is really the colour I am seeing. Afterall a person who is colour blind does not see the same 'colour' as I do. If that is the case how many other types of blindess are there? How do I know I'm even looking at a palm? How do I know my finger movements are really doing that? Are those really fingers?

If I ask you whats the difference between a Dream and being awake. How would you answer that? Both are believable enough in their tangibility. So whats the sign that I am 'awake'. Am I awake?

I realize my existence is so simple. My whole life before me are just memories. Nothing that can assure me that it ever happened except for some physical remnants like a photograph or a souvenir. But like fossil bones, I would never certainly know. And when forgotten, the physical remnants lose all meaning.

My existence is now. I see and feel yet I can never be sure if I am dreaming or awake. I close my eyes and my ears and my world disappears. Can I control my reality so easily? It seems easy enough. I drink enough to have a warped world. I do things that otherwise I wouldnt. I'd see things so differently. Already my reality is altered. How do I know its even the same reality? Or have I just changed my lenses that look out into reality with beer goggles? But if thats the case how does reality look like without goggles? What IS real. If my eyes are only lenses into reality... how does an unfiltered reality look like? What colour would it be?

But if this is all a dream why cant I will myself out of this. Why cant I dream something happy? or is this a nightmare? But it is my world. My dream. Why must I have a nightmare? Isnt it mine? Is this mine?

Holy Shite

2007-11-07T00:06:00.000-08:00

Check out all the comments! Its full of bull crap! I disappear for a year or two and boom I find rodent litter all over this place. The internet emulates life doesnt it?

"Alright. Goodbye"

He pressed his thumb firmly against the metal button as it chirps out a cheerful little beep telling him that someones disconnected from him once again. Irritatingly cheerful tone considering what just happened.

Its overwhelmingly quiet.

Holding out his hand and opening his palm, a dreamy expression on his face he could feel the cooling weight of the cold air squeezing over his skin.

Its a straight road with black tarmac carelessly applied onto the pavement, homes flanking the road. Silent houses stand around him quietly as always, their windows seeming to look elsewhere.

He blinks once and then twice slowly as he flexes his fingers looking at it bemused before he clenches his fingers and runs it through his hair, now his eyes shut tight. Furrows of worries form on his forehead as he exhales softly not wanting to disturb the still morning.

Another glance at his phone and a thoughtful pause as he thinks about what has happened. A strange thought runs through him, this must be how death is. Where choice doesnt matter. Only a certainty of an end.

He isnt sad he knows. He's already resigned and accepted the outcome. To wait is no more different than to run to it. Run or stand. Its happening. Its happened. It will happen. How strange that time doesnt matter now. To just lay down and close your eyes sounds very inviting now but yet he feels a waste. There is always after. Those other seconds when he can forget and just reset himself.

Resignation.

Been awhile

2005-10-09T08:12:00.000-07:00

I wonder does anyone know if this blog is alive again. Lft the place unattended for too long I guess.

I recently cooked for everyone something that I am proud of. Mushroom soup made all the way back from the raw uncanned mushrooms. Thats right. I MADE MY OWN MUSHROOM SOUP!!! MUAHAAHAHA! I shouldnt have skipped all those kitchen classes.

To back it up I made a Hazelnut Chocolate Cake. Pretty darn simple if you ask me.

Just have nice Dark Bitter Chocolate chopped leave the quantity for you to decide. its an art afterall)
Crushed hazelnuts.
Heavy Cream. (Or just cream)
And a pie crust. (Just add flour and butter. mix it up with hand. Add water VERY gradually. Should get a membrany texture. Roll it flat. Place it on metal crust plate. Bake. Walla.)

Pour the cream in a small saucepan and set it on medium fire. Or high if you're a speed freak with an eye for attention. Open a can of beer. Drink. Go back to your cream. It would not be boiling yet. Drink more cold beer. Steal a chocolate chunk from chopped chocolates for energy. Chocolate chunks should be in a mixing bowl. When cream gets boiling take a pull from your beer and pour your boiling cream over your chocolates. Liberally sprinkle hazelnuts into the mixture. Stir. Once everythings nice and mixed. Pour mixture into the curst filling it up nicely. Immediately stuff it into the fridge (not freezer). 2 hours. And you should have a hazelnut chocolate tart. Tastes like cadbury. (at least mine did). Serve with coffee.

Battlefield 2 the account

2005-10-09T07:52:00.000-07:00

This game I chose the American faction to play in as a support soldier with my trusty M249 SAW. Spawning into the Strike of Karkand of Battlefield 2 the first thing I noticed was the yellow fog that draped over everything giving the city of karkand a wasted dusty town.

The battle was already underway between the Middle Eastern Coalition(MEC) and the Marine Expeditionary Unit(MEU). Already I can hear the distinctive popping popcorn sound of an automatic weapon rattling in the distance writing its own story. The SAW felt good in my hands as I joined up with my squad Charlie backs pressed against a wall as the squad leader peeked over the corner.

"Rush that courtyard and stay low!" the squad leader screamed

In a rattle and jangle of loose equipment, ammo magazines clanking against each other and the sound of leather stomping down on dusty tarmac everything was a blur. I barely had time to look around for dangers. i concentrated on following everyone.

True enough the popping sound started again more fiercely than I have ever heard as bright green tracers flow around and between the squad like angry insects. People next to me suddenly get lifted off their feets as if lifted by some invisible hand their expressions a blur in that moment as the horrible whizzing sounds of bullets streak past my ear

"Hit em Hit em!" The squad leader screamed more in fright than coolness. I couldnt blame him.

I dropped on my stomach in a crawl as I extended my SAW in front of me extending its bipods slowly to hear the springs push at the bipods sturdily for me to rest that solid piece of plastic and metal death onto the dust.

Bracing my shoulders ignoring everyone around me I aimed the sight down at the flickering lights ahead of me that threatened us. Furtive figures darted around menacingly.

Fraaaak!

Fraak!

Fraaaaaaak!

The kick of letting fly a hundred pieces of lead hit me with more force than I can prepare for. Strangely comforted by the assuring rhythmic kick of the SAW I began to pick at figures in the distant courtyard watching them tumble like marionettes without strings. I didnt feel anything for these deaths. I couldnt. How could I? We all knew the price of being here. And I'm dishing out bills.

Charlie squad already has taken cover around me firing at the distant figures also taking cover as the firefight intensified from other squads joining us. My ear felt like someone poking a hot needle in as the intense sound of battle hurt me. The sharp crack of a snipers 7.62 hurted me. The misleading crunchy sound of 5.56 comforted me. The zipping return 7.62 Warsaw ammo worried me as it picked off pieces of construction around me blinding my eyes.

The squeeky rumbling announced something that we werent prepared for.

My squadlead crouched and holding a radio to his ear, plugged his other ear with his hand was screaming into the phone. Worryingly he threw the phone back to the radioman and screamed at us.

"Fall back!"

"Fall back!"

I blinked as I saw in front of me. A massive form of steel and death roll from the fog unto us.

A T-72. With a big bill for us.

I have screwed up

2005-05-07T01:50:00.000-07:00

How many foul ups can you make in a lifetime? Those wee lil bastards that gets brushed off your shoulders as you grind your way through life eventually pile up to become a really nasty pile that miraculously grows legs and bites you on your ass. This has not been a good month.

I guess I'm not such a nice guy afterall.

Llama Song

2005-04-07T03:00:00.000-07:00

For those who wish to clear their minds from their daily routines (watch at your own stoned risk)

Overwhelmed

2005-04-05T11:09:00.000-07:00

With entertainment! Eversince Martin (brother in law) and dad got me a very welcome set of improvements on my PC (bless her silicon soul) involving a 2nd much needed hard drive thats 80 gigs , a DVD - R drive and a brand spanking new 3d card my gaming life improved appreciably. Ok that was an understatement. I'm loving it!

DVD games are the best way to go. Install a huge installation and DVD no more! No more pesky rummaging through piles of packets and bags. Just double click! The catch? Seedy 3rd party installers. Some of them wont even allow you to change the directory or drive you're installing into. Some dont even install the whole thing. I just got Act of War and strangely enough i had to install 4 painful gigs of installation, and then reextract a very bogus file within the installed directory again which whopped another 4 gigs. Wtf is this. Has security caught up to the pirates? Has evil finally triumphed??

I just went nuts on a gaming spree to put it lightly. Act of War,Brother in Arms, Jagged Alliance2 + add on, Arcanum (settling old scores) , Divine Divinity, and Kotor 2. This is going to be a blissful death.

I'm going to be going to Frasiers in a few days for a so called 'Management Game' which is part of my course. Why Frasiers Hill. Why. I know a friend of mine is bringing Sheesha and another bringing a small bottle of whisky. This could turn out interesting.

I have in my fridge a treasured possesion. Tetley ALe!!! When to open it?? I dont know... what occasion? Darn... Must have meat,cheese and bread with this for the perfect taste! Perfect hack and slash meal!

I'm such a geek

Hello

2005-03-23T09:31:00.000-08:00

Wow. Its been so long since I posted. Its exam week regardless so this is just to get my blog flowing. New games galore spilling this month! Act of War, Brothers in Arms, and a whole lot more! Sleepless nights here I come!

This video cracked me up alot.
http://www.big-boys.com/articles/canwemakeit.html

a classic raiders moment ;)

Pangkor!

2005-02-14T02:04:00.000-08:00

Back from Pangkor!

I must admit that even after all those years I still do get stirred by being on a beach. Salty air. Constant sound of crashing waves. Very nice rooms. Beautiful milfs. Ah. Nice.

Sun was blazing hot all the while. i think I got myself sunburnt in some parts but nothing too serious. Dont think it will get me more tanned than this. Did lotsa swimming and walking. Explored the coast. Drank myself nuts at the lounge courtesy of my bro in law. Whiskey and beer!

Drive back was horrible though since College starts the next day. Darn. I need a holiday for my holiday. Happy gruelling work day boys.

Red Packets

2005-02-08T09:42:00.000-08:00

Happy Chinese New Year fellas. Lotsa food(non halal variety), alchohol(non halal) , and dirty jokes.

My bro in law is back
Sister is back
My baby nephew is here!! Me uncle!

Cute little guy. Has the most serious face I have ever seen. He's going to be a ladys guy. I am so expecting that.

Warm

2005-01-31T09:00:00.000-08:00

Its been a warm sleepy afternoon filled with lectures and jokes (shared) that makes the whole world seem good. It really just takes a single event to change your opinion and priorities in life and goddamn I dont even recognize it anymore pretty as it is.

Had real chinese food today courtesy of a friend. Makes me feel rather ashamed of myself.

Spewed nescafe over a friend. Decided to tie a tie with both hands. Didnt want to put down nescafe can. Decided to hold it in my mouth. Friend asked me " When will you get your ang Pau's?" and I promptly answered only to drop the can onto the friend. Yours truly!

I feel. Confident.

Fire Ants

2005-01-30T03:26:00.000-08:00

Recipes for aching worry

A dose of coffee
Add a shitload of paranoia
Cover it with a lot of thinking
Let it simmer with lots of time

I dont know why this whole month has been an uneasy month for me.I always catch myself thinking of the WhatIfs and the WhenItDoes's which springs up unbidden and unwelcome to make me more than uneasy. Its scary for me to realize just how much shit CAN go wrong when you think of all the possibilities especially with my freaky bad luck record.

I must admit that I am living a great life with more than I should be asking for and frankly this 2 months has been a great month for me full of joy and pleasures. Forgotten smile muscles in a way. And when you settle in comfortably.. you start thinking. And worrying.

Its harder to get optimistic with each passing day.

Ranting ends.

Your webcam was still up

2005-01-16T06:50:00.000-08:00

http://funpic.hu/swf/numanuma.html

Good imaginary times

2005-01-13T06:02:00.000-08:00

Double click. Eve of Destruction. 5 minutes.6 minutes. Finding servers. **ck. why must every server be anywhere but here. Ooh. Asian server. Jap server? Nice ping. Nice map. We were soldiers?

Kewl. Gosh. 64 players? Gotta kill some graphic details. Nice. Joining. 2 minutes. Nice I'm in. Holy shit! Gotta turn down volume. Sounds good. Maybe I'll grab this headphone. Mm. Volume up. Loud enough to jar teeth! Gunfire! Nice. Started. Let me grab this heli. Nice. Actually got it. Ooh. People actually getting into transport Heli's! Holy goddamn. Full load. Lemme see the map. Type M. Ah. Capture this points. Let me just land them in this clearing.

Taking off. Crappy EOD controls. Take it slow. Why do door gunners always shoot when theres noone. Irritating. Anyways. Lotsa trees. Jungles. I see the clearing. coming in for a rolling land. Holy! Lotsa green tracers and sparks! Goddamn it! Someone just died in the heli! I heard that! Crap crap. Slow movements. No crashing. Someone actually popped smoke?!? wow. Landing. Lost 2nd gunner. Noones taking it over. Ah well. Down! Guys getting out! Bullets whacking metal= painful ears. Screaming off!

Repeat as many times as you can until the server changes map.

A typical Eve of Destruction game.

Funny thread

2005-01-09T07:19:00.000-08:00

http://www.pointofexistence.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=2208&st=0

cracked me up

2005-01-06T00:00:00.000-08:00

Sounds messed

Warhammer Details

2005-01-05T23:57:00.000-08:00

http://www.criticalhit.co.uk/w40krp/

This is where I get some of the info on Warhammer40k

Kewl.

2005-01-03T02:25:00.000-08:00

Friend showed me this.

http://www.cyborgname.com/

kewl

Fresh

2005-01-02T03:18:00.000-08:00

A fresh new year. Ah. Wonder whats going to happen this time. No complaints so far.

Life is good.

Anyone traded half chewed cheese through mouths before? ;)

For those desperate times...

2004-12-28T09:30:00.000-08:00

Use only in emergencies

http://radioworldwide.gospelcom.net/essaygenerator/

A white christmas to you

2004-12-26T01:00:00.000-08:00

The christmas has come and gone without even a knock at the door. I am beginning to think that.. its not the Christmas spirit that is lacking progressively each year. Its just that I'm getting older every year. Depressing thought.

I had the best Christmas night ever. And she gave me the best christmas gift ever. I can almost become religious I think. What I am going through now has rendered all my other interests to a dull gray. Huddling in corners screaming for backup in the online world of Desert Combat doesnt hold the same thrill. Snapping off single shots at furtive movements in the jungles of BFV:Point of Existence doesnt excite me. Quite obvious where I am headed.

My mind is now in a state of torpor. I just cant think. I only have a very pretty picture in my head. My only fear now is loss.

I can only lose what I have

Wish you guys a Happy Incoming New Year.
Hope you guys smiled at Christmas

Wow

2004-12-22T10:56:00.000-08:00

All I can say is. Wow. Life. Is. Good.

Highrollers

2004-12-18T11:57:00.000-08:00

Today. I was made aware of the stake of an emotional bet. The gamble. And the trust you place your emotional heart onto the hands of the other person. How every word and gesture brings bile to your throat and promises you a life of pain or bliss. An eldritch storm of thoughts,passion and sensations that threaten to overwhelm your thinking.

True strength is exhibited at this point. I just hope I have the strength to endure this

2004-12-14T05:40:00.000-08:00

Cell shaded homeworld2

Stand Down Soldier

2004-12-12T09:21:00.000-08:00

The following is the log of communications in 'Kevin Body Network 001" at December 12 Sunday 1900 onwards.

Helm: Give me a Flash Sitrep
Leg: All fine here. Could do with some authorized movement. Slight cramp
Hands: Got ourselves full with the food
Digestion: Mouth needs some checking. Having trouble talking and chewing. Stomach section reports heavy digestion issues. Dont expect energy boosy until late tommorow.
Brain: Conversations are going fine. Might run out of topics but thats not a danger at the moment. Situations under control.
Helm: Understood. Steer conversations towards mild probing. Hand gestures increase. I need that energy soon. Initate order for coffee
Brain: Initate coffee order aye.
Hand: On the way.
Brain: We seem kinda happy boss
Helm: Great. I will be in my bunk. wake me in 2200 unless theres an emergency.

2100 Dec 12

Brain: Flash flash situation shift. *** is implying she wants to go somewhere else instead of home. States question of 'are you bored'. Requesting orders out.
Memory: Records state theres a nearby Mamak store for drinks and conversation
Social cognitive: She wants only conversation. Suggestion approved
Mating Drive: I dont think my boys are going to get any action today?
Helm: Negative on that MD. Initate drive order.

2115 Dec 12

Brain: Noting ***'es actions are getting more energetic. Subjects of conversation are great. Plenty of matches but we're running out of energy.
Helm: Darn. Should have kept some reserves from yesterday.
Digestion: I'm giving her all she's got captain!
Helm: I hear you. Brain. Tune to attentive smile mode
Brain: Attentive smile mode aye.
Hands: Reporting uneasy fidget.
Helm: Keep it handled hand. We cant help you now.
Brain: Progress is good captain. We got an influx of dirty jokes. Subject is now perceived as frank and open. Shall I authorize full scale conversation sir?
Helm: Do that. But only at Defcon 3.
Brain: No conversations about Dnd aye.

0035 December 13

Brain: My boys cant handle it anymore sir. Last nights strain is getting here. I had to medivac the 'energetic conversation' department out. Powers out in there. Looks ugly boss
Helm: Thats it. Sound the evac
Brain: Evac sounded boss.

0045 December 13

Brain: Going... going... subject has entered the house. We're done!
Helm: Oh geez.... what a night. Hows everyone?
Legs: We lost some boss but otherwise we're great
Hands: Looks ugly here boss. We had to strain our muscles abit and it cost us some boys. Muscles would be out
Digestion: Digestions smooth boss. We're letting out air to relieve pressure.
Helm: Good job guys. Stand down.
MatingDrive: Getting bored here boss
Helm: In time. Out.

Nailbiting

2004-12-12T01:40:00.000-08:00

I'm having a date!... tonight!... and I feel lousy as hell. I havent had a haircut in a few weeks. I am still having a light head from last night. And I sure as hell dont feel like eating. And I'm having a date tonight!

Even her names ominous. Why. Why am I so dumb!

Ribs cracker for gamers

2004-11-18T05:20:00.000-08:00

http://www.matstudios.com/files/gta4real.mpg

definitely cracked mine.

Afterthought

2004-11-18T04:23:00.000-08:00

Dems Question Kerry's Leftover Funds
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
WASHINGTON — Democratic Party leaders said Wednesday they want to know why Sen. John Kerry (search) ended his presidential campaign with more than $15 million in the bank, money that could have helped Democratic candidates across the country.
Some said he will be pressured to give the money to Democratic campaign committees rather than save it for a potential White House bid in 2008.
"Democrats are questioning why he sat on so much money that could have helped him defeat George Bush or helped down-ballot races, many of which could have gone our way with a few more million dollars," said Donna Brazile (search), campaign manager for Al Gore's (search) 2000 presidential race.
Brazile is a member of the 400-plus member Democratic National Committee, which meets early next year to pick a new party chairman. One high-ranking member of the DNC, speaking on condition of anonymity, said word of Kerry's nest egg has stirred anger on the committee and could hurt his chances of putting an ally in the chairmanship.
Congressional Democrats and labor leaders also privately questioned Kerry's motives. One said he would personally ask the Massachusetts senator to donate some of the money to the Democratic House and Senate campaign committees.Democrats lost seats in both the House and Senate on Nov. 2, setbacks compounded by the multimillion-dollar debts they incurred in the process.
The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (search) borrowed $10 million in the final days of a campaign in which it spent heavily in Texas, where four veteran lawmakers wound up losing their seats. The Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee borrowed a smaller amount, more than $3 million according to officials. Even so, Democrats lost four Senate seats, and will have 44 seats when the new Congress convenes, fewer than at any time since 1930.
Three former Kerry campaign aides, also demanding anonymity out of concerns about alienating their former boss, said they were surprised and disappointed to learn that he left so much money in the bank.
Kerry had roughly $45 million left in his primary campaign fund as of mid-October, according to his Federal Election Commission report, and could use that as seed money for another presidential bid.
His final report is not due until next month, but officials close to Kerry said he has $15 million to $17 million in that account, with no outstanding debts, after giving the DNC about $23 million and state parties about $9 million since the mid-October report.
In addition, the report showed that Kerry had about $7 million on hand in a legal and accounting compliance fund that he could use for legal expenses in a 2008 campaign. Officials said he raised several million more for that account since the filing.
Last summer, Kerry donated $3 million each to the House and Senate campaign committees and $2 million to the Democratic Governors Association.
While Kerry has likely given more money to state committees than any other nominee, no other Democrat has raised as much as he did. And second-guessing Democrats said Wednesday they couldn't recall a candidate leaving so much money on the table after a campaign.
"He's going to have to give some of it up for 2005 and beyond," Brazile said. "The party will demand it."

Ranting

2004-11-18T04:08:00.000-08:00

As I watch the news today I am filled with frustration and desperation over the deliberate masking of news and the blatant shamelessness of people willing to say anything to earn a shred of respect from their community. This has been going on for so long but for today I realize that I just cant stand it anymore.

Granted that my views on the Iraq war would be considered biased by many (especially here) and for all I know I could be deceiving myself but I really think the US army got it tough. Its bad enough that noone knows that they actively participate in domestic construction projects and welfare. Its bad enough that they have restricted their rules of engagements for minimal collateral damage to the point of death from militants that arent restricted to killing their own brothers. As a counter I know that many might claim that there IS an obscene amount of damage. Namely 100,000 dead civilians since the onset of the war. Not my field but I'll show you this interesting discussion that gives alot of information on that number. http://www.chicagoboyz.net/archives/002543.html

Darn. I hate going this direction. Enough hatred being preached from where I am.

I still remember vividly when the whole invasion started and I was watching some local demonstration going on in TV happening in malaysia. ' A crowd has gathered by the throng. its numbers impressive and roiling with passion. A thin wild eyed man clambering onto the stage screaming in bahasa shrilly " They are animals! They are animals!"

I dont exactly cheer the war nor mock the dead. But I say let respect be given where its due.

I am not making a point. I just want to scream at something. My monitor has been very tolerant lately.

Oldies... sweet.. 3d card less oldies

2004-10-07T07:23:00.000-07:00

Was surfing around.. and I stumbled on the motherload of Abandonwares!!! Just sign up for free (I hope) and free access to (most) old school games! Kin! Monkey Island 2 for download over there! God knows how many more. Still checking out.... playing fable now. SWEET

http://www.cdos.org/std_games_review.php?id=381

Hooah!

2004-09-30T04:03:00.000-07:00

What can I say what can I say. I only had a single week of break this semester and a short one it was. Went to Langkawi on a drinking spree (Suffering my first major knockout and hangover). The month of good PC games out. I spent a LOT of money getting the new releases. Thank god for pirated stuff. Hope noone official watching this. Dawn of War's intro bought a tear to my eye. Its been a while since I've seen anything resembling Mechwarrior 2's intro... usually they're just so... stuffy. And you just cant hate Space Marines to fight to the bloody glorious death for the emperor against damn greenskins. *sniff*. Good times

Sims 2. No comment. Love and hate it. I already am in my senior age in one incarnation and the other is living a scandalously polygamous life who got married with an equally polygamous life. Imagine my suprise when I checked 'her' Social contacts only to find a lot of nice pink hearts. This is definitely a 'Virtual Life Simulation'

I am now officially in my Industrial Training with what I suspect a mistake. Supposed to be in operations (Kuli. Translated as slave labour) but I got transferred into Marketing PR. No complaints. Checked with the people in charge and they seem pretty happy to keep me in (I think). I know I am. This is cool stuff marketing PR. If only I get paid.....the foods here good. So not much soreness about it.

Warning to gamers. Avoid Locomotion. Chris Sawyer is dead! Its bad. Message me if you want a free copy (3cd's). Full Spectrum Warrior is nice. Closest thing to BlackHawkDown.

Man. I'm a gaming geek.

Cheers. Life cant laugh at you if you laugh at him loud enough.

Gird thy self

2004-09-13T08:08:00.000-07:00

Well.. thats a long pause in blogging. Sorry. Exams around the corner and all of a sudden time is gold. Will be finishing them end of this week. Will get down to blogging then.

Btw. Anyone interested in Paintball please contact me. Teasing the idea of forming a team of min:8 max:17. Venue is NPNG sungai buloh. average out the price would be 40-45 per game. Still a floating unconfirmed thing. So. Take your time.

Laterz

2004-08-23T09:12:00.000-07:00

Freaky drill sergeant

2004-08-23T09:11:00.000-07:00

Cute

2004-08-23T09:10:00.000-07:00

Bad hair day

Tattered flag of pride

2004-08-20T07:40:00.000-07:00

I dub the word of the day. Freakish. Today is the grand finals for my Public Speaking Finals. Nervous and jittery I found out I have restaurant service from 9 to 2. Came to college with a mess of clothes hangers and a jacket blocking a mirror I painfully made my way to serve dumb guests with cute plates. What the hey. Robert Lam (judge of the damn thing) is coming on my table.

Guest from another table peers curiously at me
" Arent you in the finals?"
I grin " Yeah. How did you know?"
" I saw you. Just wondering. They told us to tell you that you'd have to get ready by 1 am. Rehearsals and all that."
I froze. glance at watch. 1:15. Curses and waving of arms. After quick talking the teach I rush down to the basement where my car is parked. Concluding that going to the locker to change is going to take far too much time. I went to my car. Open door. Grabbed clothes. Tore mine off. I hear the hurried clicks of a pair of high heels. I just dont watch as I frantically get into my nicer jacket and clothes.

Rushed up. Ooh. Briefing. Not much. Relaxed in aircond. Then. The Speech competition started. Made friends with this girl called Farah. Nice person. I went out. Did my speech. More than a little pleased with myself. She blinks. Drags me " You.. have the same exact notes as mine?" We compared our notes.
" Holy damn"
" In the entire internet. You took the same journal I took for notes???"
. " Let me guess. Google?" laughs. She panics. Starts rewriting something. When she finished her speech she gets back.
"You're from main campus before this?" I asked
" yeah! A-levels" she chirps
I furrow my brows as I considered her. It would be possible. " You know JK?"
She widens her eyes " Yeah!! We were close friends"
" I... am not suprised. "
" kewl!"
She laughs " You have a double thumb!"
" Yeah... " and she starts looking and poking at it just like everyone else does.
" I have a double thumb too!" and shows me her hand with a really weird nipple looking flesh on her hand.
I recoil " Jeezuz! This is... oh my.." I am flabbergasted. By the coincedences. And it just looked gross.
" Looks like a nipple" I blurted wide eyed
" Feels like one", she laughs

Well. I cant remember the rest of the conversation but to put it short. I didnt win. I am disappointed. I thought it was good... (insert ranting and whining) Ah well. Another tick in the 'goddamn it could have been good' list.

Conspiracies abound

2004-08-16T08:45:00.000-07:00

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/presaddress2.shtml

The address we never heard...

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/fartingcat.html

This so.. totally destroyed my tummy.

A car drive

2004-08-12T03:39:00.000-07:00

There is something very peaceful about driving your car after a long long day. Your mind foggy from bone numbing exhaustion. Your body feeling sticky from perspiration with your shirt clinging to your armpits. That strangely comfortable feeling of a BO'd body. A loud music of any heavy variety blasting in your ears. And you wearing a nice contented 'That shit is over' smile.

Todays drive was just like any other. Tiresome day at coll and the eager ride home. Sun was burning bright red in the evening. Traffic is slow but I feel no rush. I just want to listen to the radio or the Cd. Laughing by myself at the weird things people say in the radio. Noting the weird thing that weird guy in the pickup guy is doing with his hands. Feeling the steady control of my car, almost an out of body into car feeling.

I didnt even curse at anyone.
Its a good day.

2004-08-02T09:01:00.001-07:00

I am really running out of dumb pictures

2004-08-02T09:01:00.000-07:00

dangers of sending your pictures to anyone

2004-08-02T08:57:00.000-07:00

Funny spam!4

A walk in concrete

2004-08-02T07:48:00.000-07:00

I took a walk around 1-Utama with my mom today. My dads off to Myanmar for his job. Its his 2nd time there so far. He will be back in a week. Should be quite fast. Back to 1-utama. Had a nice dinner with my mom. STuffed ourselves as usual. Had a cake at Secret Recipe. I started noticing the crowd. Ever noticed that 3 out of 4 people walking around are couples? Even if you discount families. I mean just boy girl couple. Maybe some of them a little old lah I guess. But mostly. Makes you think if you're the minority or majority. Got myself a Soldier of Fortune magazine. Ah. Magazine stalls are definitely getting better. Tempur and Prajurit just makes you 'slightly' proud to be Malaysian. We have a really cool looking special forces. Even though they pose too much.

I stole a few cups of vodka/coke for last night. Had a horrible morning. That goddamn bottle our neighbour gave us is still bloody half full. Its an obligation I think to try to finish it.

Saw the trailer for 'Brother in Arms'!!! Drool!!!! Beautiful graphics with Full Spectrum Warrior mechanics? A sprinkle of Medal of Honour and a heavy dollop of Call of Duty!

Got an album from Wayne Wonder. Nice. I didnt know he was Jamaican :p funny rides to college every morning.

I still have an assignment to ***ing finish. Been procrastinating around too long. Writing this blog.

Have a nice goddamn usual working week.

Only Desert Combat players need see

2004-07-28T02:45:00.000-07:00

Just as the title said

http://uploads.ungrounded.net/content.php?id=183380&name=183380_dc.swf&title=Real%20DC&date=1090900800&quality=b&uj=0&w=455&h=338

2004-07-27T04:56:00.000-07:00

And finally this.

2004-07-27T04:54:00.000-07:00

Hope noone gets insulted. I just thought it looks funny.

2004-07-27T04:47:00.000-07:00

This always stirs my imagination

Rusty gears

2004-07-25T00:41:00.000-07:00

Tiring day. over. Fun day. over. I had fun... just rp'ed a very lighthearted session over in Kats place with some guys. First time that combat was so... minimal. Rp was actually quite heavy ( and weird). The usual bloodthirsty noob rush occasionally happened. "I slash him" was uttered several times. Memories of older players commiting atrocities in thankfully fantasy realms started rushing in. it was good. Laughs were aplenty and eyebrows were constantly raised.

Anyone who played Dnd with me would probably strangle me if they knew how relaxed the rules were. 2 levels in less than 3 hours. ANyways. Enough dnd rambling.

Heres a really weird game I found
http://www.gluelondon.com/creativeshowcase/hysterical_girlfriend/main.html

Have a nice weekend peeps.

Driver!

2004-07-22T09:36:00.000-07:00

I saw this video and just cant believe it. People do drive great. Somewhere.

http://www.cyberonic.net/~marcin/wmpembed.html

Capitabliss

2004-07-19T06:47:00.000-07:00

The beginning of a hospitality week in beloved Taylors. Today is Professional Day. Beautiful monday. What does professional day mean? Well... we all get to dress up in jackets, suits and so on so that we can look. yep. professional. Its purely cosmetic. Got on my favourite (only) jacket and drove to college. Feels weird driving to your everyday occupation/responsibility with a jacket.

Everyone I knew off walked with an extra bounce in their feet I noticed. The ones who forgot about this significant day acted almost meek. Strange day.

A few days ago I managed to test my beautiful 4 wheeler for its amphibious capabilities. it rained really heavy. The road outside my college got flooded. High enough that it flooded a car right in front of me. With an ecstatic grin and a swelling of chest I flicked the gear to low and after assuring my passengers (fellow college hitchikers not wanting to get wet in mentioned heavy rain) I drove into the flood waters at a stately steady 30 kmph. All seemed fine. All went fine. I got through. Sorry to disappoint anyone expecting a disaster story. I just love driving through water.

Tag basket

2004-07-18T02:26:00.000-07:00

Didnt realize getting a tagboard is this easy. Now I shall ponder on the mysteries of pic uploading. Anyone knows if theres a way to change the background wallpaper?

Sunday sleepy afternoon. No comments. Enjoy yourself. SHouldnt be looking at my blog on a sunday. shame on you

Midnight cough

2004-07-17T09:29:00.000-07:00

Its midnight. 12:28. I'm sleepless. Coughing. nursing a flu. And a happy collection of aches in my joints. A head full of gloomy thoughts. A reminder of more fun days to come. And a whole library of bad literature. Crickets outside. I can hear only one or two rather than the whole goddamn chorus today. Almost muted. Clicking of the goddamn keyboard sounds depressing. Not in the mood to play the usual game. Eyes burning. Melodramatic ranting ensues.

Well. I'm bored. Let me write a story. I'll see how its greeted by anyone seeing it. If they think its weak and bad I'll do something else.

The rain pelted down on him. The rich invading smell of refuse and rain filling his senses. He shifts uneasily against the brick wall nuzzling his butt against the garbage getting himself comfortable. His eyes blink. Watering. He rubs at it. Legs splayed out in front of him. A smile at the passing people. He inches against the wall and the garbage. He smiles up at the rain. The stinging slap of rain drops on his weathered face. He wipes at his face thought it still remains wet. He makes himself comfortable. He knows at least its raining on him.

didnt come out as intended. I think its going nowhere and vague. Any suggestions how to continue this? Or is it that bad?

Gloomy afternoon syndrome

2004-07-15T23:56:00.000-07:00

Well its another gloomy afternoon (check the title). Its that time of day where its just bright enough to wake you up but dark enough to encourage inactivity. Result? Me being gloomy. So to cheer myself up I have decided to play a few rounds of BF: Pirates saying really bad phrase lines over the net involving rum and cutlasses.

My cats still sleeping since I kept bugging her last night.. came down for something to eat at night and she kept on trying to sleep as she gets washed by the harsh refrigerator light and the constant flicking of lights made by an unclear head and hungry stomach.

Must stop before I rant. More pirates!

Cute

2004-07-11T21:54:00.000-07:00

After noting the mushrooming of blogs around... kinda wondered what is the attraction to setting up blogs. I dont write really well though... but maybe keeping a life journal of somesort will come in handy some day. Always wanted to keep a diary. Thanks for dropping over.